Traveling Blog: Tony Alicea

September 2, 2011

Hey everyone, I’m somewhere else today!

Tony Alicea writes a sweet blog, Expect the Exceptional, and he won a guest post from me.  It’s pretty awesome.

So, everyone go over there, leave a comment, check out what Tony has to say.  That’s it.  Form a single file line…no pushing…

All right, I’m ready to talk.  For reals.

After two posts and over 130 comments on the subject of baby-making, it seems some of you are curious about why I’m suddenly talking about this.  I started to get Facebook and email messages asking me what’s up.

Well, this is actually a topic I’ve been holding back for quite a while.  In fact, this marks the first time in three years that I’ve cleared something with my wife before writing about it.

See, my wife and I have been married five years.  And we don’t have kids.

And that was okay.

But I’ve learned a few things about myself over the last five years.

Continue Reading…

X-treme Baby-Making

August 29, 2011

So…a bunch of people have an opinion on me not having kids.

It’s not like it’s news.  But seventy comments after I revealed the three things I’ve learned about childlessness, I realized this is a pretty fertile (ha) topic.

The comments ranged from lots of guys cyber-slapping me on the back and telling me to wait until I’m ready to people who urged me to hurry up because kids are God’s blessing.  Kids are, to say the least, controversial.

This isn’t going to become a Daddy-blog, or a non-Daddy blog (if that makes any sense at all.)  But this is a topic I’ve been holding back for a long time, so I have some thoughts that are ready to pop on this one like an overdue pregnant woman, so expect a few more posts on the subject, including today.

As I think more about our decisions to have children, or remain without children, the more I realize just, in many ways, the decision is absurd and completely backwards.

Continue Reading…

Maybe I Should Have a Kid

August 26, 2011

Here’s the thing: my wife and I have been married for five years…

…and we don’t have children.

What Joy I'm Missing Out On

We are very happily married.  I love her to no end.  We were two of the very first among our friends to get hitched.  But now, even though birth rates apparently continue to drop, we find ourselves in an ever-shrinking club of childless friends.  The vast majority of our friends now have their own poopy progeny.

The blog world is no different.  While there are some notable bloggers who remain childless, the vast majority of you are mommy-bloggers and daddy-bloggers.  And while I offer no judgement on you for using your offspring as blog fodder, no one really talks about what it is like to remain without wee ones in the house.

But I have discovered a few very important things about being married, without kids.

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As bloggers, we’re all into this online “community” thing.

But have you ever gotten to meet any of your online friends in person?

I’ve met a few.

The first one was out of the blue.  I was applying for a job.  I was sitting in the lobby, waiting for my appointment, when the lady at the desk asked if I was a blogger.  That was weirdly awesome, and it is the only time I have been recognized in public.

Pete and Leslie invited my wife and I to have lunch with them at their house this summer.

Last winter, Seth and Darrell both asked me to have coffee with them while they were in my neck of the woods.  My wife is not the sort of person who just goes to have coffee with strangers, but her fears and expectations were not met when I did not return home from coffee, murdered.

But there is one time of year when I get to meet a whole bunch of cool bloggers…if that’s not an oxymoron.

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Stop Believing in Yourself

August 22, 2011

What do we tell children every day of their lives?

“Just believe in yourself.”

Just believe in yourself, and you can do anything you set your mind to do.

Geez.  We spend a lot of time trying to build up our kids self-esteem.  I’m pretty sure we worship childhood.  The last thing we want to do is let a kid go disappointed, or let their self esteem get dinged.

But that phrase, “Just believe in yourself,” it suddenly seems…well, wrong.  Like it’s the last thing, especially as Christians that we ought to be teaching our kids.

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