This month, ABC debuted the confusingly titled “GCB.” It’s a show about a bunch of women who apparently have personal vendettas against all the other women. To avoid offending any viewers’ delicate sensibilities, the show is called by it’s acronym, instead of its full title, Good Christian Bitches. Yes, I’m not putting asterisks or anything in place of the vowels. We’re all adults here.
Of course, the Christian forums are heating up with the usual righteous indignation. Everyone always asks why Christians can’t be depicted in a positive light.
I did some thinking on this over the last couple of days, and I’ve come to the conclusion that every Christian who is probably offended by the show’s title, (myself included) has pretty much missed the entire point. And I’ll tell you why Christians will never, never be portrayed positively in TV or movies, and why that’s a good thing.
G.C.B. = C.R.A.P.
First of all, if IMDB is to be believed, GCB is a pretty awful show. It has a mediocre rating. It’ll be dead and gone before we know it. I’m pretty sure it’s Desperate Housewives Go to Church. Second, this show knows it’s bad. You don’t title a show an acronym…unless it’s “CSI.” Naming a show a string of letters is the height of pomposity, asking an audience to follow a show that does not even have a name.
Which is Worse: the ‘C’ or the ‘B?’
Second, you may not know this, because no one watches ABC, except for Modern Family, but this the second show that they are currently airing with the word “bitch” implied in the title. (The other being Don’t Trust the B_____ is Apartment 23. Yes, the asinine blanks after the capital ‘B’ is the actual title.) I don’t get it. I thought that word was supposed to be insulting and degrading to women. I don’t give a crap that GCB is set in a “Christian” backdrop. Where are the feminists decrying the use of the ‘B’ word? Forget Christians whining on behalf of themselves. They ought to be standing up for women in general, since the feminists are no longer interested in such things.
Think about this: the ‘B’ is the only letter in the title that is actually sincere. The characters are not at all “good.” They go to church, but aren’t really “Christian.” But they do act like, well…
Why No One Wants a Christian Movie
Finally, Christians, this is why we will never be portrayed in a positive light on TV or in movies:
Good Christians make terrible entertainment.
That is the rule. Good Christians make great eulogies, but bad movies.
That’s why the vast majority of Christian movies totally suck. On the flipside, it’s the reason the Corleones were not good Catholics, but they had a fantastic movie. It’s why Alec is more entertaining than Steven. Good Christians are not entertaining. They don’t cause conflict. Bad Christians provide lots of conflict and entertainment.
See, the problem with most Christians is they think this constitutes “persecution.” We whine and complain about why TV and movies won’t depict us in positive ways. We get our undies in a twist because we think this means there is a “war” on Christianity. Why can’t Hollywood give Christianity a positive portrayal?
Forget it. Quit whining. You be Christianity’s positive portrayal.
What say you? Is the use of “Christian” or the ‘B’ more offensive? Why do you think Hollywood is so averse to depicting us positively?