Apparently from the “bits and pieces” I’ve seen…(wink), you can either have an ample dose of nuclear radiation spilled all over your body, while an image of you, nude, is projected onto an IMAX size stereoscopic 3D movie screen, or you can have your “junk” fumbled with by a friendly TSA representative / convicted sex offender in the backseat of a car. Either way, people are getting their underwear in a bunch over it all. Heh.
So among stories of screaming three year olds and elderly nuns being frisked…thoroughly, a bunch of people it seems are going to boycott the “naked scanners” in favor of the pat down the day before Thanksgiving.
I’m all about civil disobedience, so I’ve got some thoughts to help you prepare for your Thanksgiving travels.
This is the reason I’m not a doctor
There’s a reason I didn’t become a doctor. This is no offense to any of you, but most of us are kind of gross without our clothes. Heck, a lot of people aren’t that attractive with their clothes. It’s not like most of us are at our best when we prepare to fly either. I know I usually pose as a disheveled hobo when flying. Everyone’s all up in arms about “perverts” gawking and groping passengers, but if I would think after a day of that job, anyone would be cured of any and all human sexual attraction. Blarf.
I think it’s funny that in almost every episode of protest, adults are using every grade school euphemism for genitalia they can think of. We have grown men and women saying “private parts,” “backside,” “down there,” “area,” or “junk.” Can I offer a solution? We need one standard term for the place we don’t want to be touched. I propose everyone use the more academic and technical sounding “crotchal region.” Either that, or the government should offer us a doll or sock monkey to point to when we’re asked where the mean TSA agent touched us.
Civil disobedience…by following the rules
I’m all for civil disobedience. I think it rules. Sit ins, tea parties, they’re all good. But I don’t think I’ve ever heard of people protesting getting “groped” by…getting groped. That’s like PETA making a public protest by butchering a cow in the street…which, come to think of it, they just might do.
I have a couple of alternative protest options:
1. While getting frisked, whisper insults at the TSA agents during the pat-down. You know, hurt their feelings a little bit, made them feel bad about themselves.
2. Wear a kilt to the airport. There’s a “no fly zone” for you.
3. Carry something really unreasonable in your pants. Like raw biscuits. Assert your rights to carry raw biscuits in your pants…loudly.
Public enemy number one: nuns
You might have already seen the photo of that nun getting frisked. The real irony is that the TSA agent is obviously a Muslim. Some other passenger must have snapped that photo while waiting in line (thus, further violating the nun’s rights), and that image has been splashed all over the internet (completely obliterating the nun’s rights.) But the one person I haven’t heard complain is the nun herself. She acted like a big girl and kept her dignity intact, while the rest of us throw temper tantrums (like “don’t touch my junk” guy and three-year-old girls.)
Meanwhile, I haven’t heard one statement from the Pope or any church about how Christian women can avoid the screenings and preserve their modesty. Do Christians care about modesty? The only church officials that have spoken out are Muslim leaders, advising Muslim women to challenge TSA agents and file complaints if they “feel insulted in any way.” And so, our political correctness and cultural sensitivity has come full circle to the point where our airport security is not allowed to screen people whose countrymen are the cause of our need for airport security in the first place (which pointing out is also politically incorrect.) To those people who think they should be exempt, I have a big suitcase full of “cram it” for you. Do you think a kindly old Amish man would be exempt from airport screening because it’s against his religion?
I do find it ironic that the Muslim leaders seem much more vocally concerned about the modesty and dignity of their women than Christian leaders. I didn’t notice anyone jumping in to defend the nun getting frisked. People just snapped photos.
Right to privacy
I don’t know if the screenings are illegal according to the fourth amendment, which prohibits unlawful search. People have also said that when you’re in public, you don’t have a right to privacy. Of course, the supposed “right to privacy” is also the basis for the “right” to have an abortion. Just saying.
Are you flying this Thanksgiving, or any time soon? What do you think, traveling or not? Do we have a right to privacy when we’re in a public airport? Are Muslim leaders in the wrong, or should Christian leaders be more vocal about the modesty of Christian women?